For Loving Couples

I Love to Treat My Wife Every Moment I Can

 How We Learn to Love

I love to treat my wife with simple things. We have had rituals that I have always done, after she showers I love to put lotion on her back, take her a glass of wine if she is in the tub and give home pedicures, but I love to do that for her as much as she enjoys that.

The truth is, it is the simplest things in life that count, and there are so many ways to show how you love your partner; you have to be able to show the softer side to make love work. But our behaviours have been learned throughout our lives and experiences.

 I have worked mostly with men in the construction field and many of them put on the tough act but deep down most of them have been committed to their partners,  talked about them with respect  and have shared about their good relationships. I have also seen the other side where there was no respect or at least they did not show it as it was not “the done” thing to do in, especially in front of the other guys, they played the hard-nosed tough guy, but in conversation I could see the reflection of how they were raised in their family and the expectations they had put on them.  

Often these were the men that sadly lived with regret and sadness, some lost their marriages and could not figure out why and some lost of spouse after an illness and was left wishing they that had said and done what they really wanted to.

 I was raised by my grandmother after my parents separated ; I did not see  either of them for years, I had virtually no male influence in my life, not to say this was a good thing but it was all I knew and has resulted in the way I treat my wife. The same for the other guys and how they reacted was the effects of how they were raised.

Some are fortunate to have good balanced family lives, but that seems to be few and far between while others lived with dominant fathers who treated women with little respect. It is amazing how our history shapes our live, however we can all make changes and improvements and it is never too late to bring about change, even if there are small changes. You do not have to get a divorce, leave your family and start all over to make those changes and that is what happens all too often, people feel they are expected to be a certain way and think that if they start to make those changes people will think they are crazy and there is something wrong with them.

But if you are willing to make small changes and take a stand, those around you make changes, too and respond to you how you would like to be treated. You must take the high road. There are marriage course available both via a church or non denominational and sometimes at no cost, or to take a vacation with your  partner to rediscover the person you know you want to be “the real you” not having to put on any pretences and this will also help you to talk about the way you would like things and to be and you have been thinking  about how to make those changes and I am sure you will get input and bring a lot of happiness to your spouse after she realises the man she loves is still “in there”.

After all if you are going to be together let it be in happiness and never having to live with regret.