For Loving Couples

Don’t say that!

The words that fly out of the mouths of some people during arguments with their partner can be hurtful and can lead to long lasting damage in the relationship. Serious relationships are reserved for adults. We all know that children cannot handle the strong emotions that go along with being in a relationship, but neither can immature adults.

There are couples that throw threats of divorce around like they are saying they don’t feel like making dinner. They treat the words that come out of their mouths far too lightly. They find the words that will cut their partners as deeply as possible, bringing up insecurities, insulting their families and even saying that they hate them.

Immature people think that the harm of such words can be simply fixed by saying “I’m sorry” once they are no longer angry. This is not always the case. In many cases, especially when harsh words are spoken over time, the damage can be irreparable and the relationship will never be what it could have been had those cruel words not been spoken.

If you don’t mean it, then don’t say it.

Saying, “I hate you”, “I want a divorce” “I never should have married you” and other such things are often words that are spoken for no other reason than to inflict pain on someone’s partner. If you say such things, you really need to take a good look in the mirror and realize that you have serious growing up to do.

There is NOTHING that is ok about spewing such venom to the one you are supposed to love. It doesn’t matter if you both do it. It doesn’t matter who started it. Someone has to stop it, or there is no way that the relationship can last.

Going back later and saying “I didn’t mean it. You know I love you” does little to erase the pain caused by the words that were spoken in anger.
Be careful about the words you say ESPECIALLY when you are angry. Anger is not an excuse to say hateful things.

Do Unto Others

We all know we’re supposed to treat others the way that we want to be treated. Why does it seem that some people think this does not apply to their partner? It should apply even more to the one you love! If you are having a bad day at work, it’s unlikely that you scream at your boss or co-workers. If you are overwhelmed at work, do you scream “I QUIT”, before storming out the room? If you did, do you think you could just come back later and tell your boss “I’m sorry…I was just angry”? No, of course not.
Why then do you think that it is ok to treat your partner with such disregard? You are able to control your emotions and your tongue when dealing with all of the other people in your life. Give you partner the same respect. In fact, give your partner even more respect than you give the rest of the world.

You wouldn’t want your partner to hit below the belt every time he or she got angry. Don’t do it to them. Don’t make the mistake of thinking you can use your partner as a verbal punching bag without consequences. If you love your partner, show them by learning to control your tongue.