Married In Church, But Divorced In Court?
Marriage In Church, Yet divorced in Court?
Is There A Doble Standard on Our System?
Why is it that we get married in a church, but we get divorced in a court room? I had never thought about it until the other day as I was lying down. When I got married it never occurred to me that there may be other ways of getting married. Religion has always been involved in the marriage of people of all races. Getting the blessings from the church, Taking “special” classes on marriage, compatibility classes. The “church”, a term I will use loosely to identify a religious faith . Being a bit of a history buff I could find many statements from all varieties about blessing of the couples and assuring they know there bonds to the church and there deity. There are some religions’ that have to give permission to the couple in question permission to seek a divorce, or separation. A special board is brought together and the married couple or spouse that is requesting the divorce states their issues concerning the reasons they want to anull the vows. My confusion is further compounded by the fact that our legal justice system is involved and in today’s societies more couples are filing for separations and divorce then in years past.
But the answers to my question remain at a distant. There has always been a divide between church and state, but then why is it such common place for the two to come together for the very special event in a couples relationship? As I peeled away the layers, I found several reasons and some I had took for granted. For one the Health Department becomes involved for reasons of public safety and future health issues, permits of a clean bill of health and tracking of family blood lines and everything seems so unromantic, but this is what it has become to get married. I guess I was under a guise of the old romantic view of boy meets girl, they fall in love, he asks her parents for her hand in marriage and they go forward in life. Kind of a silly, as I think about it. But when your wrapped up in the love blanket you don’t see a whole lot going on around you. I needed clarifications.
Legal Requirements for Getting Married- findlaw.com-What are the legal requirements for getting married?
The requirements are simple, although they vary from state to state. In general, a man and a woman wishing to marry must obtain a license in the state in which they wish to be married, usually from a county clerk, a city clerk, or a clerk of the court. The fee usually is low.
Parties who wish to marry must have the capacity to do so. This means that neither can be married to someone else, the parties must be of a certain age, and both must understand that they are being married and what it means to be married. If, because of drunkenness, mental illness, or some other problem, one of the parties lacks capacity, the marriage will not be valid.
A few states require the man and the woman to have blood tests for venereal disease before the license is issued, although most do not require a blood test. In states that require a blood test, some will not issue a license if one or both of the parties have venereal disease, while others will allow the marriage if the couple knows the disease is present.
In a few states, a couple must show proof of immunity or vaccination for certain diseases or completion of a general physical examination.
Close blood relatives cannot marry, although in some states, first cousins can marry. Of those states that allow first cousins to marry, a few states also require that one of the cousins be unable to conceive children.
Some states require a waiting period, generally three days, between the time the license is issued and the time of the marriage ceremony.
American Bar Association Family Legal Guide
Copyright © 2004 American Bar Association
Ok, so there are viable health issues and I can understand that. I also understand we can have a civil court wedding, and it’s a much simpler process by far. But the same things apply, blood test and other “permits”, so you can marry the person of your dreams. But why then do we divorce in a court of law, when the only thing broken is the hearts of the loving couples.
For example, if a couple is seeking an annulment on the basis that one of the parties defrauded the other, the court would want to know when the fraud was first discovered. If the spouse being deceived discovered the fraud but then continued in the marriage for a considerable time after, the court would be less likely to grant an annulment and the couple would have to seek a traditional divorce instead.-MYFAMILYLAW.com
Divorce relies on the fact that there is a legal marriage in place. And although it returns the parties to single status, it does not “undo” the marriage but rather stops it from continuing. –MYFAMILYLAW.com
Never having enjoyed the legal letter of the law I did find that for the most part, the couple to be married was having their best interest looked after. Marriage is a life long commitment and one that should be deeply considered and not taken lightly. I am also not a deeply religious, church going person, but it does not mean I don’t have my faith. I believe that a couple who comes together and finds the pull of love stronger than anything they could imagine, when they agree to take the journey of life together that is the correct time to consider marriage. It is truly a journey to take with someone, you want to be with. This is how we become Loving Couples.
