For Loving Couples

Sustaining a romantic marriage—if you have to work at it, is it true love?  I think so—even a true love needs to be sustained with effort.  Just as we need to add fuel to a fire, we need to add fuel to our relationships.  When we fall in love, especially if it happens quickly, we tend to see our beloved in an idealized way.  It’s only human.  We see what we want to see—we see what we are yearning for.  Over time our perspective can change—we get to know our beloved better—attractive qualities may not be quite as alluring or even annoying at times, and some unappealing qualities become apparent.  Here is the test.  Can you continue to appreciate and love the other person as you discover who they really are and as they evolve as well?  Nothing stays exactly the same—not you—not your partner–not how you see your partner—and not how he or she sees you.  Successful couples continue to rejoice in each other and accept the other’s differences and foibles.  They focus on giving—giving compliments, kind words, flowers, affection, time…